Archive for Ubisoft

Fuck The Fear of Offending Some Fuckers!

Posted in Commentary, Gaming these days ... with tags , , , , on February 2, 2019 by Rabidgames

So, it seems Ubisoft uses some – honestly only semi-funny and admittedly rather poorly timed – joke PR  for The Division 2 mentioning the US government shutdown – and then melts down over it. Wait, what?

come-see-what-a-real-government-shutdown-looks-like-in-41350320

So that’s offensive?

Remember when Ubisoft was insisting it’s not their intention to make “overtly” political games? That might why Far Cry 5 was devoid of any controversy except killing white christian extremists … well, with the help of slightly less radical mostly white christians … And of course there were still some obvious Trump jokes in there …

Anyway. Ubisoft, you’re making a game in Washington. With the name “Tom Clancy” in it. And it’s a post-apocalyptic game. That’s a politics hattrick, for fuck’s sake! But it wasn’t even overtly political nor was it directed at anyone. It was just an edgy joke, nothing more.

But you know what? Fuck your apology and fuck of phobia of being offensive. Fuck being scared of offending someone somewhere on this planet. And fuck you for being offended by anything that is not even directed at you personally.

And from a business perspective – ride out the shitstorm. It’s better PR than seeming to be a bunch of scared headless chicken.That’s just stupid.

Besides, where does it stop? The next person will be offended that Ghost Recon: Wildlands is a right-wing militarist wet dream. Another guy will then claim that Watch Dogs 2 glorifies hacking and godless life in godless San Francisco. And remember that you can slaughter innocent pixanimals in Far Cry 5! And what about all that terribly unchristian fucking everybody and their goats in Assassin’s Creed Odyssey (and then taking all choices away at the end of a DLC)?

Rabidgames wonders: What the fuck happened to us? Since when is one guy somewhere always offended about anything, or even worse, thinks that someone else might be offended? Why are we so afraid the shit we say could offend anyone? Except when we do it all the time on social media of course …

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Wildlands’ DLC Narco Road is a Potholed Scam … With a Llama Bike!

Posted in Hands On, The Latest with tags , , , , on April 24, 2017 by Rabidgames

As you know, Rabidgames thinks Ghost Recon Wildlands is a great game with tons of stuff to do; it is entirely possible to only have completed 2 out of 21 provinces after playing the game for 23 hours. So you might think more can only be good, right?

Not in this case! The first DLC, Narco Road, is outright crap. It’s shit. You know, Wildlands has two weaknesses: The driving and flying mechanics. So what could go wrong if you base a DLC on both? Yep, pretty much everything.

Narco Road introduces you to driving around with monster trucks destroying shit in your way, and even some racing. Besides, you can drift or jump monster trucks or muscle cars, and you get a nice boost … But well, those driving mechanics, that were good enough for casually driving from A to B, or maybe hunting down cartel member C, now ask for precision and timing, without having been improved for Narco Road. It’s still doable, but it’s not fun. At all.

And then the flying … you have to fly around a lot in choppers or planes, including a set of side missions to dust coca plants, and there are even more SAM sites than before, making these side missions incredibly annoying. And again, they’re not fun at all.

What else is there? Some more bland side stuff, drifting, jumping or climbing mountains (yawn), side stuff where you race to a caged wild animal, kill enemies and secure the package by tagging it. Sounds pointless, is pointless. The best new side activity in Narco Road is finding a lost car somewhere on the map, using a photo to find its whereabouts. And it’s not even that great.

Even worse, Narco Road takes place in a few re-drawn and not exactly remarkable Western provinces, you have to start with a fresh level 20 character, you have less weapons at your disposal, and everything you can gather is just re-skinned weapons from Wildlands. Oh, and the strange story puts you undercover into Santa Blanca where you fight a rival cartel that doesn’t seem to exist in the main game …

Even worse, you’re on your own. No squad to help you, making fighting enemies tedious. Each damn mission takes much longer now, and once you’re dead, no AI revives you (weirdly enough, coop still works). Narco Road really does a damn impressive job to take the strengths of Wildlands – the massive, diverse map, the squad fighting, the weapon customisation – and then remove them.

Its only saving grace could well be the “Lorenzo Bike”, a llama bike shooting rainbow farts and making weird noises, but that’s surely not worth the price, right? In case you got Narco Road anyway (most likely because you bought the season pass as Narco Road sounded good on paper, didn’t it?), here’s how to find the llama bike around 2 miles south-east of the Sueno Mausoleum :

So unless you bought the season pass, avoid this pathetic DLC like the plague! It seems Ubisoft said “hey folks, what about some more outlandish stuff? You know, like Saints Row or GTA? Let’s just make sure to get it out quickly, and let’s re-use everything instead of making something new! Oh, and please, please let’s not integrate anything into the main game!” The result … Narco Road. Half-baked ideas and terrible execution will make sure this is a broken road not much travelled.

Rabidgames swears: Fucking hell! Ubisoft, we thought you’ve learned from your past DLC mistakes! But Narco Road is an awful piece of pointless DLC not worth the time or the money. What the fuck were you thinking publishing this mess?

Ghost Recon: Wildlands or The Perfect Narcos Sandbox – With a Blight

Posted in Hands On with tags , , , , on March 18, 2017 by Rabidgames

After two betas, we can now finally roam all of Bolivia in Ghost Recon: Wildlands – and it is a massive country! And the beauty of it is not just the size and diversity of the map or the dozens of weapons and attachments, it’s the fact that Wildlands is a true, proper sandbox, probably one of the best in recent years!

Whether you want to play co-op or solo, whether you want to go in stealthy or very loud, whether you like long fire fights or sync shots, whether you want to even go in along or just rain mortar fire upon your enemies, whether you want a crisp challenge or just drive around to explore, whether you recon with a binocular, your drone or your weapon, all of this and more is entirely up to you.

Ghost Recon: Wildlands comes very, very close to great sandbox legends such as Just Cause 2 or the first Mercenaries, and the more Rabidgames plays, the more it feels like a mix of these two games. Add a pinch of Far Cry fuck-ups when things go wrong (enemy patrols can show up at very inopportune times), and perhaps there are also traces of pinch of Phantom Pain’s DNA in here (gathering resources or tagging enemies as well as how you should approach enemy bases).

A word of warning though – like in Just Cause 2, you pretty much do the same couple of missions over and over again, and approaching an occupied city, base or building changes only depending on the size and weaponry of your enemies. It’s entirely up to you and your creativity how to approach it. Even if you play the game solo, all the scenarios above and more are possible. Most missions allow various approaches. Even stopping an enemy convoy can be tackled in many ways – grab an armoured APC and let your guys fire away, ram the vehicles with a truck, or simply lay mines or C4 on the streets.

In a nutshell, Wildlands is a massive sandbox that gives you plenty of freedom to do things your way. For some, the mission variety might seem lacking – “go there, kill that, abduct him, destroy this” don’t vary too often, sure. But that’s not the point. The point of Wildlands is to write your own stories as you tackle your objectives.

So far, so good. But while Wildlands is great fun, it is blighted by one big issue – motherfucking micro-transaction! True, it might be mostly cosmetics, but what the flying fuck? Why is the only leather jacket hidden behind a fucking pay-wall? Couple that with the 30 quid season pass, and it leaves a sour taste in your mouth. Come on Ubisoft, for fuck’s sake! Look at Horizon Zero Dawn, or look at Nier: Automata: There are no fucking piece of shit pay-walls, folks! You buy the game, you get all of it! Please, for the love of gaming, stop this shite already!

Apart from that monetary blight, the single radio channel looping its 5 or so pieces too quickly and a few technical hick-ups, Wildlands is a fucking brilliant sandbox. So brilliant that it has been the biggest launch seller so far this year, beating both Horizon Zero Dawn and Zelda! It seems this is a sandbox for everyone. And while the game might be rough around the edges, it can also look amazing.

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Rabidgames recons: If it wasn’t for the disgusting practices of locking away stuff behind a fucking pay-wall, Wildlands would leave only a sweet taste in the mouth of sandbox fans. But the sour taste of mindless monetisation is lingering on despite the many positives. It is a shame, but the shame there is entirely on Ubisoft!

 

Watch Dogs or The 21st Century Sandbox

Posted in Hands On with tags , on May 29, 2014 by Rabidgames

It is quite ironic the Ubisoft servers are down on the day Watch Dogs is released. First, the game wasn’t available at midnight (though pre-download and all were working fine), then the servers were down, Uplay not working … digital may be dawning, but it’s still far from shining bright.

But all that was forgotten as soon as Watch Dogs took off – the first mission is a short tutorial, and afterwards, the whole world is a digital oyster, waiting to be hacked. You can walk around scanning people and intimate details, getting some money or infos about future crimes or hidden packages – all calmly, while walking or slowly cruising around in your car.

Of course, you can also manipulate traffic lights, detonate all kind of electronic devices, or shoot people in the face. The choice is yours, friend.

And then, there’s the mini-games. From chess puzzle tasks to 3D platforming and even to drug fuelled trips with Spider Tank … Watch Dogs is crazy and wants to be crazy. Even UFO Mayhem from Saints Row IV or GTA V’s drugged nightmares pale in comparison to some of the crazy ideas Ubisoft has come up with.

Mind you, Rabidgames played for 4 hours doing nothing but the first mission and looking at the world of Watch Dogs – nothing else. Okay, second mission … theoretically, it would have been a blood bath. But in Watch Dogs, infiltration is possible without firing a single shot, hell, without setting foot in the hostile area – if you want. Hint: For the first time in video game history, surveillance cameras are your best friend.

Let’s make no mistake here – comparing Watch Dogs to GTA or Assassin’s Creed doesn’t do any of these games justice. Its closest relatives are rather Splinter Cell or Deus Ex (stealth and upgrade systems) and the likes of Just Cause 2, the Mercenaries series or the thematically close The Saboteur instead … the latter just because they offered you tons of freedom.

Of course, self-anointed hardcore gamers and die-hard elitists will fret at Watch Dogs – it is not Dark Souls hard, it is not nail-biting tough, but, and that’s the most important thing at the end of the day, it is simply one thing: fun.

Rabidgames enjoys this playground: Watch Dogs is a game that can be played in a really relaxed state. If you want. That’s true freedom in a true sandbox. Oh, and mind you, all of that can be seen within the first three hours of this game!

South Park: The Stick of Truth CENSORED or Fuck Off, You Sell-Out Cunts

Posted in The Latest with tags , , , on February 26, 2014 by Rabidgames

As might know by now, South Park: The Stick of Truth has been censored in Europe. Why? Well, Ubisoft, and the glorious South Park makers bowed and stripped down to the German (and Australian) nazi-like censorship laws and just censored the game for all PAL regions. The official reason? Well, it seems “this was a market decision.”

Censorship includes, according to Eurogamer:

  • A mini-game in which the doctor is performing an abortion on the player.

  • A mini-game in which the player is performing an abortion on the character Randy.

  • Five anal probing scenes involving someone actively being probed. The scenes play out as normal before and after the active probing sequences.

Well, Rabidgames’ official answer to this chickenshit move is “from day 1 purchase to 2nd hand purchase”. If you pussies decide to give up integrity just to save some money and to appease some fascist censorship authorities, Rabidgames decides to show the middlefinger and keep his money in his wallet for now.

Rabidgames demands: People, gamers of the world, unite! Let’s vote with our wallets! If some pussies back down because of marketing fears, let’s not buy the inferior product South Park: The Limp Dock of Cowardice will be for us Europeans and fellow PAL sufferers. Let them suffer. Artistic integrity … Ubisoft’s ass!

Will Watch Dogs Merge Realities?

Posted in News with tags , , on May 11, 2013 by Rabidgames

Ubisoft’s Watch Dogs surely is an ambitious project. A new video from Eurogamer (accompanied by this article) portrays how ambitious it really is:

It all looks pretty good: The graphics, the open world, the options (stealth, violence, hacking), the random stuff about the inhabitants of Watch Dogs’ world, the side missions … and of course, the intriguing player-to-player interaction which could really stand out:

“That person was a real player carrying out an objective within their own game who had unknowingly become part of your city. Sometimes you will be told if another player will be watching you during these objectives. Sometimes you won’t.”

That just sounds like next-gen multiplayer – and it sounds like fun! Imagine playing Watch Dogs and trailing someone, but you can never be sure if he’s man or machine (on a side note – it would be awesome if the AI in such missions would show erratic behaviour as well).

Rabidgames is excited: Watch Dogs has the potential to be a serious contender to GTA V and Bioshock Infinite in the battle for GOTY. If Ubisoft have learned from the flaws of their other brand names (nonsensical story in Far Cry 3, bugs and linear missions in Assassin’s Creed 3), Watch Dogs will be an amazing game.

Far Cry 3 or Fun, Choices and Insanity

Posted in Played & Explained with tags , , , on December 13, 2012 by Rabidgames

Expect some crazy spoilers here.

Okay, ending rage (2012’s motto it seems) aside, Far Cry 3 is definitely a solid shooter where the fun and gun parts are a big plus. The insanity however, is only partly voluntary …

The first thing you should know if you want to have fun with Far Cry 3 – it’s not an ordinary shooter in the veins of Corridors of Duty, it is primarily an open world game. So please don’t expect a story-driven, linear experience – instead, be prepared the real protagonist of Far Cry 3 is its open and vivid world. With that in mind, Ubisoft itself is to blame for high expectations in storytelling – don’t advertise a game as a drama to explore depths of human minds, etc. etc. when it’s all about exploration and funny ways of killing after all.

That in mind, Far Cry 3 succeeds on a gameplay level. The story missions and side missions are varied, hunting down animals with specific weapons is sometimes challenging, sometimes pure chaos, and finding all relics and letters of the lost (which tell the story of Japanese forces in WW II; spoilers: it did not end too well) require you to explore caves, to fly on hilltops with ruins or to dive into the shark-inhabited seas. You have to finish off enemy “bosses” with a knife in assassination missions, which ranges from cool (if they battle with your allies) to boring (most of the time). Furthermore, there are your usual mini-games such as poker, sharpshooting and throwing knives. That’s all good. Not that good are the completely misplaced racing challenges with no story basis and the pointless online challenges (some are alright, some are boring as hell). While you can do a lot of stuff or ignore it, you’ll tend to ignore it since the connections to anything else are thinner than any golden thread.

But hey, fuck missions, the open world is where the fun in Far Cry 3 is: If you want to take on an enemy patrol or an outpost, there are many options to choose from: Do you feel like playing Rambo, shooting them up with RPGs, machine gun fire and grenades? Do you want to rush in there with a jeep and its machine gun or do you prefer to attack from the sea? Do you want to set fire to the surrounding woods to roast them? Do you want to eliminate them from afar with your sniper or your awesome bow (easily the best weapon of the game)? Do you want to take them down via brutal melee takedowns (which can later be combined)? or, if you’re special, what about leading a tiger or a bear to the enemy? All of the above is possible in Far Cry 3, and it’s all fun. Above all – stealth actually works great. If you hide in bushes, enemies won’t easily spot you as long as you don’t do something like, well, shooting them. Be aware of dogs though. If you get spotted, you can easily run away and hide somewhere else. Enemies know your general location, but you can outsmart them easily.

As seen, choice is an elemental aspect of Far Cry 3’s open world, which also comes into play if you upgrade your arsenal: By “repairing” radio towers, you get almost all guns for free (you could also buy them, but why would you?), you can buy weapon upgrades, and after hunting animals, you get upgrades for your wallet, more weapons slots, more ammunition, and so on. Sadly, that’s where the pacing of Far Cry 3 is off: If there are two islands, why are we allowed to unlock everything but a few weapons on the first island? This makes no sense whatsoever. Exploration on the second island is rather pointless unless you’re a completionist.

Now, let’s talk about insanity: As Rabidgames mentioned, don’t expect a serious, down-to-earth drama from Far Cry 3. But still, a spoilt, annyoing, useless brat turns into Rambo within mere minutes? Just because of some magical tattoos? Dear Ubisoft, try to find the middle between your rushed characater development in Far Cry 3 (good for gameplay’s sake, bad for immersion) and the looooooong tutorial in Assassin’s Creed 3 (bad for the gameplay, good for immersion and that nice twist). It can’t be that hard.
Then, Far Cry 3 is another victim of the villain-dies-early disease: Just as in Saints Row The Third, trailers, the beginning and the plot are focussed on the one main villain … who dies halfway through. Seriously, what the holy fuck? This is insane!

The story … well, it seems as if important chunks are missing here and there: Abduction, liberation, boy-becomes-warrior-and-finds-his-meaning-in-life-or-so-he-thinks, Vaas, something else, Hoyt, and then the most insane twist ever … the ending is simply insane. But let’s put the story into a fair perspective here: First, it’s well done for most parts (let’s forget heavily scripted scenes and QTE boss battles for a minute). But second, it could have been done ten times better. Yes, it is an open world game, and yes, Just Cause 2 is fun despite having virtually no story at all, but that doesn’t always work. With Far Cry 3, Jason’s decisive moments are not fleshed out, his friends remain spoilt douche bags who should have been sold to slavers or killed and no one would have given a tiger’s left ball, and Vaas, Becker and Hoyt should have been featured more in the game. Don’t get Rabidgames wrong, the story is okay, but it’s not great, it’s a tale of wasted potential.

Now, let’s talk about scripted scenes: Remember the open world and choices? Well, forget about them in one third of the story missions of Far Cry 3. It’s either sneaking or run ‘n’ gun. Worse, many levels are strictly linear: one way in, one way out. Even worse, some are scripted – granted if you like Uncharted and timers ticking down, you won’t have a problem with it but if you don’t … you’re sometimes fucked.

And then, let’s rage: That ending. First of all, it’s insane. Well, choose if you think it’s insanely awesome or insanely awful, but it only makes sense in a mind full of drugs. So, after you are the hero of the islands and a worthy Rakyat leader, your allies abduct your friends and gently ask you to sacrifice them in order to literally sever your ties to the past. Alright, yeah … But that’s not even worth the ending rage. That one starts when you choose the bad ending, which tells you why the French associate orgasm and death. But hold on, Jason is Jesus! After the credits, Jason is alive again! Halleluja. Seriously, Ubisoft, first you dictate which ending is supposed to be good and which one is deemed bad by treating us like naughty boys, and then you resurrect a dead protagonist? Fuck off! Oh, and if you want to see what happens when you choose the other ending – bad luck, mate. Just play the last couple of missions again, which are a collection of long interactive cutscenes, a ridiculous QTE fight, one shoot-out, an airborne rails mission and some more interactive cutscenes, culminating in you making your choice. Yes, the only available auto-save is AFTER all this stuff. Oh, and forget about manual saving. Goddamn it, that fucking ending!

By the way, Rabidgames might be a bit harsh on Far Cry 3. After all, Yahtzee likes it. And is it insane if someone thinks he’s a banana?

A banana. Seriously?

Rabidgames draws his bow: For once, Ubisoft listened to the fans: Virtually all negative points of Far Cry 2 have been eliminated. That’s a good thing, of course. Plus, Far Cry 3 IS fun. Hunting pirates with your bow and explosive arrows is basically the definition of fun! And yet, what could have been great is just good once more. Sometimes, fun is a good thing, but you know, sometimes there’s more to life than a hedonistic life style … which ironically is also one of Far Cry 3’s lessons.