Archive for October, 2011

Saints Row: The Third’s ingenious Initiation Station

Posted in News, The Latest on October 31, 2011 by Rabidgames

Finally, Volition and THQ unleashed the Initiation Station for Saints Row: The Third.

And yes, it absolutely fucking awesome! Rabidgames loves it.

There are tons of options to choose from. You can choose trivial stuff like the form the face or how skinny or fat your character should be. Then you have more weird stuff: Wanna have an obese warrior with shiny red skin? check? Wanna have a muscular punk who speaks in a girlish voice? Check. Big boobs or a massive dick? Check (There’s a limit even here though – you can’t have dick and tits both at once …).

There are also tons of clothing options from several mascots to revealing lingerie and cop uniforms. Plus you can dress as a pirate! Or you simply cross-dress if you want … the possibilities are not endless but there are many. So if you meet someone in Saints Row: The Third who wears a cop uniform, you can be sure that dude has pretty poor imagination

However, there is some bad news, too.
Volition removed the different clothing layers which means you can’t freely combine bras, shirts and coats anymore. Instead, you can only choose from set combinations. According to our brave developer Volition, it had something to do with better character models in the game and such technical issues Rabidgames won’t bore you folks with. Of course, the tons of clothing options in this demo alone (around 80% of all clothes in the game) make the feeble customisation options in GTA IV want to kill themselves.

Before you go, just have a look at what is possible with Saints Row: The Third‘s Initiation Station.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Rabidgames proudly introduces:


Behold Robo-Saint. Who gives a fuck about RoboCop now?

Rabidgames says: Technically, the Initiation Station counts as a demo. Rabidgames bets it will be a “demo” used very, very often. And the best thing is you can upload (and later download) any character. Well done, guys. The overture is close to perfection, now please just give us Saints Row: The Third! Now!!!

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The truth about Uncharted 3

Posted in News, The Latest on October 30, 2011 by Rabidgames

Wikileaks is water under the bridge, Rabidgames is now on the perennial quest to uncover the truth.

An anonymous contributor leaked this delicate document to Rabidgames. It unveils the truth about Uncharted 3’s “epic” 10-hour search for a lost ancient city:

Who would have guessed the truth? It’s 2011, after all!

Why looking for cities the hard way when there are useful gadgets like GPS, google maps or facebook’s handy “share where you are”. Mr Drake, please remember: Keep your friends close, but make your enemies facebook friends, too.

Expect more shocking and revealing truths from Rabidgames soon!

WWE ’12: First DLC characters revealed

Posted in Gaming these days ... on October 25, 2011 by Rabidgames

Ah, DLC …

THQ has just released its first batch of DLC (which apparently got ripped out of the game to make us pay even more money) for the upcoming wrestling behemoth WWE ’12. Have a look at some of the DLC characters and if they are any good at all:

The good

Edge and Christian, both in their classic attitude attire. Now, it’s a shame we won’t have the Dudleys and the Hardy Boys in WWE ’12  to relive the glories of the first TLC matches …

When we talk about the past, we have to talk about the first years of the Heart Break Kid. In WWE ’12, fans can also play the Michaels of old.

Oh yes, the Legion of Doom come to the ring with their legendary shoulder pads. Actually, shouldn’t they have done it in the first place?

The bad

Do we need Brodus Clay? No. Do we want another “monster” aka clumsy fatso? No. Sadly, Brodus Clay is part of our first DLC pack for WWE ’12, too. Well, at least we have one more punching bag …

If there is a limited space for DLC characters, it should be used wisely. Putting 3 commentators in there does not seem to be a wise choice. Yes, it might make sense after the Cole-Lawler feud – but Rabidgames still doesn’t like it. Why not adding some proper wrestlers instead of commentators? O by the way, we don’t need Vince McMahon any more as well!

Rabidgames says: The first DLC pack for WWE ’12 is a mix between great and useless. Rabidgames is not really looking forward to buying this kind of DLC which adds only minor stuff but probably won’t come cheap.

Dead Island or How Critics Fail

Posted in The Latest on October 21, 2011 by Rabidgames

Careful, folks: This is at the same time both a review of Dead Island and a bloody rant. Yes, Rabidgames looks at you, Eurogamer, Edge, 4players (a German magazine) and yes, even at the infamous Zero Punctuation. Why? Because you weren’t doing your job properly. Simple as that.

Of course, there are more magazines which gave ridiculous reviews which make you think they played the game for 2 hours and then decided to take a nap or a crap or both. And afterwards they decided to be fucking nitpicking and criticising minor issues every other game gets easily away with. But let’s just say the above reviewers annoyed Rabidgames the most.

First of all, of course, Dead Island has faults. A shitload of faults. That’s a fact. The technical issues are plain stupid! Come on, Techland, if you allow only one save slot per character make fucking sure they will never ever corrupt. Not exactly rocket science, right?Also, sometime you miraculously end up somewhere else – where you’ve never been before. This might have something to do with your active quest – but how can this happen? Let’s not even start with harmless but annoying glitches such as stuff randomly hovering and shit … As we can see it is absolutely fair to harshly criticise Dead Island for all those faults. Then again, how comes Fallout New Vegas got away with being completely fucking broken then – without getting trashed? It still got 9 ratings! Ever heard of consistency, guys?

And yes, the story is also weak. Granted, Borderlands or Dark Souls have virtually no story as well but that’s a lame excuse. Also, it is weird the atmosphere constantly changes. You have sombre music and all of a sudden, the mood gets light and comical … As we can clearly see, Dead Island is far from perfect so the critics are not completely wrong.

That said, let’s have a look at stuff where some reviewers got it wrong:

1. The controls are fucked
You gotta be kidding me. Honestly, Rabidgames would like to play with those guys and explain to them how the controls work. It really makes you think what those dudes where doing when they deem the perfectly working analogue fighting system useless. Yes, it takes some time getting used to it, but shouldn’t we expect exactly that from professional reviewers? Rabidgames has played Dead Island for almost 70 hours and can state this: The fighting controls are immersive and precise. Of course, a knife can’t outrange a paddle – but that’s common sense! Admittedly, jumping can be a pain because sometimes you get stuck in some questionable obstacles (which hurts like hell if a Ram is hunting you down) – but even those instances are minor and definitely not a symptom of “useless” controls.

2. All characters are “not that different”
Umm, ok. In the beginning, they are all the same. That’s true. But come on guys, we’re talking about a RPG here. Please, anyone tell me all characters feel still the same at level 20 (then again, it is dubious if they have ever played that far … ). For starters: You have four characters: One takes a hammer and kills everything with a few hits, another one chops off limbs with ease with blades. Now let’s swap weapons and guess what – those weapons are a ton weaker and degrade faster. Oh, and then there’s “rage” which is a super strong mode for all characters – but completely different for each one. While one character uses martial arts to kick ass, another takes out her weapon and shoots like crazy. How’s that the same? And on top of all of that, you can develop one character in different ways: Go down the rage way and you’ll be able to unleash your impressive rage after 5 normal kills, or build a fighting machine walking down the combat way or be versatile and follow the survival way. You can’t even unlock everything in one playthrough.

3. Game is too easy
Act 1 is pretty easy, true. The Resort really is a walk in the park. But as soon as you’re in the city and start meeting Rams and dozens of zombies are following you, you barely escape just to get hunted down by the fast Infected … Not exactly that easy, isn’t it? And later on, the fucking Butchers join in who just ignore your handy kicks. And then there are human enemies. If you don’t have a gun and some ammunition you’re basically fucked against human enemies. How comes no one ever mentioned it? Have they even played that far?

4. Quests are dull
The problem with this point is that the quests are nothing special and usually just involve carrying stuff from A to B while killing x amount of C. Just like almost any other game. For instance, you visit the same hideouts again and again in Rage while doing the above. Bur for some reason, no one seemed that bothered about it. How’s that possible?

5. Not enough penalty for dying
Losing 1/10 of your money doesn’t seem bad – unless you die 10 times in a row. You also lose your grenades, your ammunition, your used medikits and your weapons degrade. The alternative would be reloading a previous checkpoint – with intact inventory and all the money.

6. Fire doesn’t burn your torch
Yes, one critic actually complained about this “problem”! The only thing left to say about this is: Name 10 games where fire consumes everything. If the game was realistic, it would mean causing a huge conflagration consuming the whole island! Well, at least that would get us rid of the zombies, right?

Rabidgames says: At the end of the gaming session, most reviews did another mistake: They compared Dead Island with Left 4 Dead and Dead Rising … while those games don’t have much in common. Sure, you got zombies, and yes, Dead Island focusses on melee fights – but that’s about it. Why don’t you compare Dead Island to Borderlands? Look at the similarities: 4 characters to choose from, a leveling system, re-spawning enemies, much focus on random weapons, virtually no story and a decent co-op mode.

So, is there a reason why exactly Dead Island gets kicked for issues any other games get away with? Maybe, maybe nothing happens if you smash and trash a game from a small independent Polish developer. Why don’t you trash Rage for its lame “go to each dungeon twice”? Why don’t you criticise Rage for the non-existing story that harshly? What about fire having no consequences on weapons in Fallout? Why not telling Call of Duty or Fifa to fuck off because they have been repeating themselves for ages?

The answer could be simple: Don’t mess with precious ad money!


Why multiplayer for Mass Effect 3 is shite

Posted in The Latest on October 10, 2011 by Rabidgames

It seems to be official now: The sci fi RPG soap opera Mass Effect 3 will have some multiplayer components. What a great idea, that’s exactly what we’ve all been waiting for … NOT! Let’s be honest: This fucking sucks!

Why, do you ask … come on, don’t you already know why?

First off, we’re talking about a fucking series that was destined and built from the start to be an epic singleplayer series. Singleplayer as in “This is the story of my very own personal commander Shepard and I decide what happens in my fucking game”. So, can anyone on earth please give Rabidgames a proper reason why there will be some multiplayer poured over it? Can anyone even think of one?

Ok then, since we’re all on the same side here let’s start why this is fucking awful: Think of all the time the developers could have put into an awesome singleplayer experience. Instead, they waste their time not only building the multiplayer, but probably also looking for a retarded explanation how they can tell it to us. Even if Mass Effect 3 has now 30 hours of campaign gameplay, it could have been 20 more hours we could have spent in our very personal Mass Effect universe …

At least, there is hope the multiplayer will be separated from the campaign. Then why isn’t it some fucking DLC? Make it optional so we see if people really want it, damn it!

Bioware, what have you done? Are you doing this crap on purpose? Why do you keep pissing your loyal fans off royally? This generation will be known as “the generation Bioware sold its soul” … First, you dumb Dragon Age 2 down and try to recycle maps in a ridiculous way hoping no one will realise … you failed. Then you tell your fans Mass Effect 3 should be more like Gears of War so you have more shooting action and completely pointless melee attacks. And there should have been a reason why grenades were removed in Mass Effect 2 … probably because they were pretty useless in the first game? But yeah, more shooting demands melee and grenades, right? People will not even realise this is a RPG anymore …

But let’s face it, Bioware doesn’t deserve all the blame, EA deserves some as well. Is it pure coincidence Mass Effect 3 will have a multiplayer just when EA introduced its rip-off online season pass thingy? Is it coincidence Bioware games become all dumbed down and more accessible so even more people can buy them? Ain’t that EA’s strategy?

At the end of the day, it doesn’t fucking matter whose fault this stupid decision was. Fact is, our money goes down the multiplayer drain in a game that simply does not need multiplayer. At all. If this crap is the future of gaming, we should all buy Skyrim ten times just to thank Bethesda for giving the multiplayer dollar signs a big fat fucking finger!